my first role models, my parents.

 Eventually, they separated, no clue if they are divorced or not because they don’t discuss their relationship with us, but I stayed with my mum for a bit before moving in with my dad. It seemed the toxicity of their relationship simmered down after the final separation but it left scars on us kids. Now that I am older, when I take a step into pursuing a relationship with a guy I get scared of my feelings and I realize I’d step back or cut that person off, not because of them but because of me, and I have no idea how to explain that feeling. I feel like I do not want to waste time in a relationship that might not work so I won’t take chances, which is really bad but it explains why not only I but all my siblings have been single for a long time, and can not maintain a solid relationship.
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